SPECIAL: Family Drama Intervention

Pass the stuffing, but not the knives this holiday season. Dealing with relatives you only see every now and then can be stressful, especially if you are staying in their home, or worse yet, if they are staying in your home. Most of the time, distance (whether in miles or in moments) makes all people tolerable. But when there are back-to-back occasions where family will come into play, many people experience anxiety just at the thought, before a word has even left anyone's mouth.

I invite you to have a more enjoyable holiday experience! For November and December only, I will run a "family drama" intervention session for you, bypassing my usual process of getting your personal  history in the first session and laying out what you need for the remainder of your sessions. For these "crunch time" months, I'll offer you a 2-hour session to clear out any holiday family drama stress and free you up to experience your relatives (and you holiday) with joy, happiness, and all the spirit of the season you would like to have pouring forth from you.

You will come in with your complaints, and we will determine together what the goal is - less stress, less anxiety, more joy, more openness, the ability to tolerate that certain someone's biting comments - and get you there fast!

Autumn Hahn is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist practicing in Weston and West Palm Beach. 

Forgive is Not Forget

 

Who do you need to forgive? A parent, a friend, a relative, yourself? Remember that forgiveness has nothing to do with approving an action. If someone wronged you, harmed you, or blocked you from greatness at a given point in time, you can forgive the action without condoning it. 

We each are doing the best we can with where we are in life at this moment. If you think of people in that way, as doing the best on their limited resources in that moment, in every moment, you can begin to see where forgiveness can take place. You can see that moment with clear intentions and that those actions, though harmful in the end, were an act of compassion or caring or maybe even negligence, but not malice. And unless someone acts maliciously, we can forgive them. We can see people as misguided and wrong, even, without acting with intent to harm. And that's something we can forgive. 

We don't want to forget. We want to move forward with clear hearts and clear minds so we can see people as they are and live each full new experience being fully present. But those feelings of resentment, of anger, of hurt, of turmoil, those can be released, freeing up the energy it took to store them and utilizing it for healing, dreaming, thinking, learning, and loving. 

"Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself," said Suzanne Somers, and it's true. That energy you use holding onto negativity hurts only you. The other person may not even know you feel that way anymore. Are you ready to explore forgiveness?

Autumn Hahn, LMHC, CHt holds sessions in Weston, Florida and can clear trauma and resentment in 2-6 sessions. Call 954-612-9553 for an appointment and to discuss your specific treatment needs.

Alternative Relationships

Threesomes? Swingers? One of my interesting niches is counseling alternative lifestyles.

Not every relationship consists of 2 partners. Sometimes there are 2 partners and a regular playmate, or 3 partners (triad), or polygamy or polyandry, or any combination you can think of, really. Something different works for everyone. And these situations can be more complicated than those involving only 2 persons - which are often complicated enough to start with!

If you are thinking of engaging in an alternative lifestyle for the first time, see me to smooth out some bumps in the road you may have overlooked or help you set the parameters that keep your relationship as the primary objective and avoid future complications.

If you are engaged in an alternative lifestyle and having an issue, see me for counseling without judgement or any need to explain why you have the relationship you do.

Verbal Deescalation

Oftentimes, we encounter someone who is upset in the course of our week, be it at work or in the community. The person gets angrier and the situation starts to come to a head. What the end result may be  depends on the person bringing potential violence or simply making those in earshot uncomfortable. How do you calm a person like this? Perhaps you are the customer service representative, a police officer, or a concerned citizen.

Here are some simple and basic techniques for deescalation:

• Talk in a calm manner that does not demean or belittle the person. 
• Keep your voice even and speak a little softer than you usually would.
• Use their first name; this keeps them grounded to you and the moment. 
• Choose words that are short and simple. 
• Nod and be agreeable, but not pandering.
• Be vague instead of saying "no." Think of the movie The Negotiator. 
• Work with the person, as best you can, and offer to help find a satisfying resolution. 
• Stay until the problem is resolved. 
• Be aware until the person has fully left the vicinity.

If the person you are dealing with has mental health issues (and there is no way you would know), these things may potentially deescalate a very bad situation and may help to stabilize the individual so they can be further processed by an authority figure.

Some states are requesting that police officers go through a 40-hour deescalation training, but it is not mandatory. Read an article on how this may have saved the life of a mentally ill man in Pennsylvania recently in the San Francisco Chronicler.

If you know someone often on the verge of angry outbursts, consider referring them for anger management. I counsel anger management for teens and adults, individually and in groups through a 10-week curriculum. Call for a consultation 954-612-9553.

Weston Group

I rent space at a group in Weston. Here's the bunch of us in our photo shoot from December.

War is Hell

One of the best things about the technique I use is that veterans never have to say anything that is classified. There are techniques to get around anything that they feel would be compromising while still getting all of the job done and the client cleared of traumatic memories.

I've worked with several veterans from a couple of different wars and they have reported a decrease in nightmares, a decrease in substance cravings as a result of self-medicating, a decrease in intrusive thoughts and images, and an increase in restfulness and peace. The results are often surprising and are almost always very fast.

End years of suffering with just a few visits and feel relief begin after the very first meeting.

I offer a military discount. Please ask when calling for a free consultation at 954-612-9553.

International Trauma

Today's blog is short, but features links you might find interesting from all around the world.

For more on any story, click the links included.

• Irish Health reports that Northern Ireland has the highest level of PTSD of the 30 countries studied.
• Adelaide Now reports police offers in Australia are getting more help due to the trauma of the situations they 
• encounter.
• The Press echoes that sentiment in New Zealand, as well as for civilians after the Canterbury earthquake in February.
• ABS CBN News reported that trauma counselors were sent to the Phillippines after the flash floods in December.
• Voice of America has published a new book for Cambodians who survived the Khmer Rouge to assist in dealing with traumatic affects.