One Wish

Let's play a little game:

If you had one wish - and think carefully - what would you spend that wish on? No cheating with extra wishes or time travel back to the moment you got the wish. You just get one.

Place your answers in the comments below. What happens after your wish comes true? What makes it such a good fit for you?

I'd wipe out everyone's student debt so the computer banks showed "Paid in full" on every single account. I imagine that the relief, the happiness, the joy spread by the lifted weight of crushing student loan debt so many young (and no longer young) people feel would spread like an amazing ripple. I'd publicize that I'd done it and set up a fund that anyone could send $100 to that would all go to charities. Imagine the good that money could do! And I bet some people would send a lot more.

And then me? I'd go back for my doctorate. Once I had the ability to take on new projects without that big bill from prior education, I'd pay for it as I went, taking out no loans. As it is, I'm starting to adjust to the idea that I'll never get my doctorate - and honestly, that's the only thing I wanted to be as a kid, a doctor of some kind, though I knew it wouldn't be traditional medicine - so it really bums me out to have to say goodbye to that dream. But with my loans as they are, there's no way I can responsibly go back to school. Oh, don't get me wrong: I'm not blaming anyone but myself for poor financial planning. But this is a skill I learned after I had debt, not before. Future Me would go back and tell Past Me to do it differently.

Faster Therapy

Our society is becoming faster paced and our attention spans are getting shorter. We're inundated with commercials and advertisements so often that it feels like that is normal, and so it is becoming. So how can we take therapy into this modern age? Do it faster!

Therapy used to take years. Who has time for that?
Freudians still believe in speculating on your childhood as a life-long process. This isn't for everyone.
Rapid Resolution Therapists believe that a single issue can be solved in 1-8 sessions. More and more often, I'm finding this to be hugely valuable.

Here are some of the benefits of rapid therapy:

• Less suffering. You're over it and back on to your happy life quickly.
• Less cost. Even a $20 co-payment gets expensive after awhile.
• More happiness. We're not dredging for sadness; we're mining for gold. It's all in the approach.
• Less time off work for sessions, dropping the kids off at the babysitter, etc.
• Less fuel burned driving to the office, as you only visit a handful of times.
• No homework. We do all the work in session. And by "we," I mean "I." You speak honestly, and tell me when something does and doesn't fit for you. I will adjust myself accordingly.

With RRT, change is immediate and lasting. You will leave each session feeling well, happier, refreshed, and energized. 

Autumn Hahn works in private practice at Clear Mind Group, LLC. in Weston, Florida. She is a licensed mental health counselor and certified clinical hypnotherapist. Appointments can be made by calling 954-612-9553.

Parenting Book

I've been hard at work on my second book! I've set myself a deadline of finishing and publishing by the end of the year, which seemed far away a couple of months ago, but time passes quickly, the older you get, it seems, and that deadline feels like it is fast approaching.

This book, unlike the self-help style of Mini-Missions, is a parenting book. Specifically, since I work with trauma, I hear a lot of things people have said happened to them, that could have been avoided. This book will be guidelines to parents of simple things they can do, and avoid doing, in order to keep their kids from being victims of trauma.

I have the cover photo and 2 completed chapters, out of 8, as well as the outline and topics for all the other chapters. It's a matter of doing the research and editing to put the rest together. I'm anticipating you will hold me accountable to my deadline by telling me you want to read it and asking about my progress.

If all goes as planned, this book will be available for Kindle and in print by the first of the year. Mini-Missions is available in both formats now, and qualifies for Prime 2-day free shipping.

Stay tuned for more information on another of my book projects, already in progress, called 5 Things. Off to the top right navigation column is a space where you can type in your email, and get my blog entries sent directly to you!

Signs of Depression

Depression is a treatable and transient state of mind that is often characterized by:

• Loss of interest in things you normally enjoy
• Feeling down, depressed, or hopeless
• Thoughts of death or suicide
• Feeling worthless or guilty
• Problems falling asleep, staying asleep, waking too early or sleeping too much
• Unexplained decrease or increase in appetite, resulting in weight gain or loss within the last month.
• Trouble thinking, concentrating, remembering, and making decisions
• Extreme tiredness or lack of energy that interferes with your ability to work or take care of your daily responsibilities
• Feeling restless, unable to sit still, or abnormally slow when moving [Source: Spark People]

If you or someone you know is suffering from depression, seek help quickly as negative thoughts can have a snowball effect resulting in an avalanche feeling. 

It is important to remember that  someone who has been depressed and now seems to be much better may have decided on suicide as an alternative to the dark feelings and should be monitored for awhile through continuing therapy. 

I give a seminar on suicide risk minimization and would be happy to speak to your group or workplace on this and other topics. For public speaking engagements, or to schedule an individual therapy session,  please call 954-612-9553.

Autumn Hahn is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist specializing in short-term therapies, and practicing in South Florida with Clear Mind Group.

Forgive is Not Forget

 

Who do you need to forgive? A parent, a friend, a relative, yourself? Remember that forgiveness has nothing to do with approving an action. If someone wronged you, harmed you, or blocked you from greatness at a given point in time, you can forgive the action without condoning it. 

We each are doing the best we can with where we are in life at this moment. If you think of people in that way, as doing the best on their limited resources in that moment, in every moment, you can begin to see where forgiveness can take place. You can see that moment with clear intentions and that those actions, though harmful in the end, were an act of compassion or caring or maybe even negligence, but not malice. And unless someone acts maliciously, we can forgive them. We can see people as misguided and wrong, even, without acting with intent to harm. And that's something we can forgive. 

We don't want to forget. We want to move forward with clear hearts and clear minds so we can see people as they are and live each full new experience being fully present. But those feelings of resentment, of anger, of hurt, of turmoil, those can be released, freeing up the energy it took to store them and utilizing it for healing, dreaming, thinking, learning, and loving. 

"Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself," said Suzanne Somers, and it's true. That energy you use holding onto negativity hurts only you. The other person may not even know you feel that way anymore. Are you ready to explore forgiveness?

Autumn Hahn, LMHC, CHt holds sessions in Weston, Florida and can clear trauma and resentment in 2-6 sessions. Call 954-612-9553 for an appointment and to discuss your specific treatment needs.

Alternative Relationships

Threesomes? Swingers? One of my interesting niches is counseling alternative lifestyles.

Not every relationship consists of 2 partners. Sometimes there are 2 partners and a regular playmate, or 3 partners (triad), or polygamy or polyandry, or any combination you can think of, really. Something different works for everyone. And these situations can be more complicated than those involving only 2 persons - which are often complicated enough to start with!

If you are thinking of engaging in an alternative lifestyle for the first time, see me to smooth out some bumps in the road you may have overlooked or help you set the parameters that keep your relationship as the primary objective and avoid future complications.

If you are engaged in an alternative lifestyle and having an issue, see me for counseling without judgement or any need to explain why you have the relationship you do.

Verbal Deescalation

Oftentimes, we encounter someone who is upset in the course of our week, be it at work or in the community. The person gets angrier and the situation starts to come to a head. What the end result may be  depends on the person bringing potential violence or simply making those in earshot uncomfortable. How do you calm a person like this? Perhaps you are the customer service representative, a police officer, or a concerned citizen.

Here are some simple and basic techniques for deescalation:

• Talk in a calm manner that does not demean or belittle the person. 
• Keep your voice even and speak a little softer than you usually would.
• Use their first name; this keeps them grounded to you and the moment. 
• Choose words that are short and simple. 
• Nod and be agreeable, but not pandering.
• Be vague instead of saying "no." Think of the movie The Negotiator. 
• Work with the person, as best you can, and offer to help find a satisfying resolution. 
• Stay until the problem is resolved. 
• Be aware until the person has fully left the vicinity.

If the person you are dealing with has mental health issues (and there is no way you would know), these things may potentially deescalate a very bad situation and may help to stabilize the individual so they can be further processed by an authority figure.

Some states are requesting that police officers go through a 40-hour deescalation training, but it is not mandatory. Read an article on how this may have saved the life of a mentally ill man in Pennsylvania recently in the San Francisco Chronicler.

If you know someone often on the verge of angry outbursts, consider referring them for anger management. I counsel anger management for teens and adults, individually and in groups through a 10-week curriculum. Call for a consultation 954-612-9553.